by Dr. Ana Nogales, Ph.D.
From the Newspaper La Opinión

A program especially designed to help the abused woman understand the abuse by her partner and to launch a more constructive campaign—one in which the blame does not fall on the victim—was developed by the Instituto Mexicano de Investigacion de Familia y Poblacion [Mexican Institute of Family and Population Investigation], the UnIversidad Autonoma de Mexico (UNAM) and other institutions.
In Mexico, experts have determined that domestic violence is an epidemic: 33% of (one in three) women in a study in the Mexico City area reported that they live in violent relationships.
Of these, 66% are physically abused, 76% are psychologically abused, and 21% are sexually abused.

In other studies, in the state of Jalisco, 57% of the women live in relationships in which violence rules and in San Miguel de Allende 61% —more than half—share this tragedy, with the husband being the aggressor in most cases. An extensive study of the female population exposed to abuse and domestic violence indicates that the woman first turns to her family and friends for support, far before she does to institutions or professionals.
To raise awareness about this serious problem, I have developed the following exercise for discussion groups.
I recommend that you reflect on this or, even better, share it with others of your community to help them plan strategies against domestic violence and help abused women, not only by offering to help them, but by exploring the idea of seeking refuge in a women’s shelter, obtaining a judicial restraining order against the abuser, involving the authorities when there is physical abuse, finding survival resources, and obtaining mental health services to alleviate emotional pain.

The following is a fictional case developed by the team from Mexico and—although it takes place in the city of Los Angeles—it is representative of most domestic violence situations.
“Rosita lives with her husband, Victor, and their two children, a 3-year-old son and a 5-year-old daughter. Rosita finished the 5th grade and is a homemaker, but she has wanted to leave Victor for some time. He doesn’t give her enough money for household expenses and he won’t let her work because he is jealous-hearted. When he arrives home drunk, he insults her and, sometimes, he forces her to have sex with him. Rosita tried to talk to him several times, but it was like talking to a brick wall. Rosita has been putting up with this for four years without telling anyone. She doesn’t know what to do…

If you are reading this as a discussion group, divide yourselves into 4 groups and have each group discuss one of the topics below, so that all the topics are covered. Later share your discussion with the whole group.
If you are using this another way, such as in a living room discussion, distribute the topics over fours meetings (over several days, for example), taking on one topic per meeting plus a fifth meeting to summarize the lessons learned.